FEELING LOST.

28.4.16



Have you ever felt lost in what you want to do in your life? that is me currently. I'm stuck and I just feel so lost and confused on what my life is and will become.

I'm even lost on how to write down what I'm feeling and I have deleted this first sentence about 20 times. 

I think I just feel in a rut especially job wise. I'm lucky I have a job but it's not one that I want for my whole life. I want to use my degree because then I won't feel it was pointless. I've tried and applied for so many jobs that I can use my degree in but I keep getting knocked down and I feel like I'm not good enough. I just feel like I don't know how to get the ball rolling but I know once I do everything will come together. 

It's also like this with other aspects. I want to drive so badly but lessons are expensive and Ive failed my theory twice before when I was 17/18. It knocked my confidence down and I just don't feel good enough. On top of that I have a lot of people telling me I won't afford the insurance or a car so then I think well what is the point. Though I Know I could save. 

I'm also feeling lost with weight loss. I was doing so well from Novemebr 2015 till March and now I find myself having a cheat day once a week and I've seen my weight increase (not dramatically by 1-2lbs) and it scares me that I will put on all the weight I lost and I can't do that. I'm trying to exercise more but it's like whatever I do it's not good enough. 

I think I'm just going through a little bit of hazy days but I know once I get my head sorted, everything will be better. I just have to have that little faith. It's been nice to have all my worries and problems written down as it's helped me identify my key areas that I want to change. 


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